Read Everything That Dunks Must Converge

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Drody's here and "We On"

December 16, 2008

I met this dude on a school bus, coming back from a track meet in Culpepper, Virginia. We didn't choose to sit together. We had to. We were freshmen on the team and had to take any seat we could get. I didn't know a thing about him, except that at basketball tryouts earlier that year we seemed to be guarding each other every drill. I remember those tryouts for two reasons. The first reason is that I spent a good amount of time afterwards puking my flu-ridden guts out into a toilet. The second reason is that those tryouts are the last time I wore my Rec-Specs. This kid next to me on the bus from Culpepper knew me as Rec-Specs. Our paths crossing once might have been coincidence. Our paths crossing twice might be described as fate. I think the conversation started, "Aren't you [Berndon's] little brother?" and that's how Harry met Lloyd.

During the 2000 Presidential election, Berndon's little brother and Rec-Specs stood outside of the Salem Elementary voting station chanting, "Nadernadernader...Nadernadernader!" not because we really cared if Ralph Nader defeated Al Gore or George W. Bush, but because his name was easier to chant and rhymed with cooler words like "Darth Vader" and "sooner or later."

We stood barechested for soccer games, covered in red paint, yelling trash talk that made weaker competitors want to quit their sports. "Shin splints" hurt. Some might call it obnoxious. Others might call it a movement.

We play football for toilet seats.

We stayed loud all the time. Some people thought we were drunk. Others knew we were just bored.

We tried the gallon challenge three times in my parents' basement, and this kid insisted on using chocolate milk; and when we failed for the third time, we tried a gallon of ice cream.

We have a strange affection for John Legend songs, and I'm not even talking about the good ones. I'm talking about songs where Kanye West raps from the perspective of his penis (how will we ever take him seriously?).

We are as a once famous voice message to Big A stated, "A Tribe of Idiots," and idiots hang onto the past because they don't know how to learn from the future, and I remember this kid on the bus next to me from Culpepper; and I can taste my first night of drunkenness (at Langston's), hear my first freestyle session (we still perform at weddings), and recall all the "so there's this girl" conversations (I feel like I had to include that last part just so people wouldn't think this is a love story between two dudes). This kid, who is the dumbest smart guy I know, the Charlie Brown to my Linus, the Belushi to my Aykroyd, The Beast to my Woverine will soon be posting on here. Read his stuff. Enjoy it. Learn from it, and know his name is Drody, the D R that once stood for "drunk" now stands for "Dr." I hope you got the patience cause "We On."


I figure there's nothing better for a Chicago sports fan than a Chicago anthem by two of Chicago's finest. Congratulations on the engagement, brother.

5 comments:

Langston said...

Welcome on board Danny boy

December 17, 2008 at 12:59 PM
Anonymous said...

friends for life are special. I hope the two of you will be that. You have a lot of good memories of days gome by but the two of you have a lot of living yet to do. the aricle is good, the names could be spelled a little better.
hope Green Bay can mess up Chicago's season on Monday night

December 17, 2008 at 3:00 PM
Teach said...

What do you mean the spelling of the names? They are spelled correctly, and by the way, what is "gome?"

December 17, 2008 at 6:33 PM
Langston said...

I think anon was making reference to your spelling of Lloyd, and probably figured you were spelling Berndon and Drody wrong.

December 17, 2008 at 7:13 PM
Teach said...

Hey, Langston, this is an issue of La Familia, but yeah, Lloyd was spelled incorrectly.

December 17, 2008 at 8:40 PM

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