Showing posts with label Jay Cutler. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jay Cutler. Show all posts
2010 Chicago Bears: Final Thoughts
In berndon4, In brendan brody, In Chicago Bears, In Fergie, In Jay CutlerJanuary 24, 2011
Green Bay vs. Chicago: Familiarity Breeds Contempt, Even in Sabretooth Tigers
In Bryan Harvey, In Chicago Bears, In Clay Matthews, In Green Bay Packers, In Jay Cutler, In NFC Championship Game, In NFL, In NFL Playoffs, In Sabretooth, In TeachJanuary 23, 2011
Today, when Clay Matthews stalks the likes of Jay Cutler, the act will be done with an emotion that is one half love and one half hate, and the vicious hits will come with a kiss that feels a lot like death. But don't be surprised if the result of such combustible personalities and dramatic stakes results in something quite ordinary, like when they last met and the score was a pedestrian 10 to 3. The great irony of two mutants mating is that their offspring is often born into this world as ordinary and vile as a Graydon Creed, a man whose only super power is to be cold-hearted and human. And, because their meetings often turn into stubborn genetics that cannot evolve into something grander, is it any wonder then that the Packers and Bears speak their pillow talk under the sound of a howling, bitter wind, off the shores of Lake Michigan?
Buying in on the Bears
In berndon 4, In Chicago Bears, In Jay Cutler, In NFC, In NFC North, In NFLDecember 10, 2010
Part of the problem is that I haven't really known what to think, and and still haven't completely gone all-in. I don't like Lovie Smith, the offensive line, or Jay Cutler all that much. I was the guy who was saying “The Bears are the worst (insert positive record) team in the history of the NFL multiple times. I thought we would lose the division to the Packers (maybe get a Wild Card road game which they would inevitably lose), going quietly into the January air as the Bulls and Black Hawks took back the Chicago sports pages.
However, things have changed. Football generally brings out the bipolar side of everyone, any fan can attest that they often hate their team and think they're awful in losing and that they're Super Bowl bound after every win. With the shorter season, you have to be really terrible to be eliminated by this point in the year. So, even with a crappy 5-7 team you cling to the hopes that they can get hot and go on a January run. I am no exception to this rule. As the Bears were piling up wins, I still wasn't convinced. That all changed after the Vikings game. Now, I'm seeing a defense that's just as good (if not better) than the Super Bowl team of 2006. I can't describe how comfortable I feel with this unit on the field. Even if Cutler throws a terrible pick, with the other team starting in the red zone, I find myself shocked when the opposition finds thereselves in the end zone. We have an elite DE, who I have loved since he was grabbing boards in Chapel Hill. And another DE playing like one in Israel Ijonije, who should be in the Pro Bowl. We have two of the top 5 LB's in the game, and a secondary with another under the radar star in Charles Tillman.
My comfort level with our defense is a given. But surprisingly enough, they've started to win me over on the offensive side of the ball. Devin Hester gives them quality field position the majority of the time. Leaving Cutler with a pretty maneuverable task. Namely, managing the game and not screwing it up. In the last couple of weeks, I feel as though Peyton Manning and Jay have switched bodies. I say this because over the past two weeks Cutler has completed 74 % of his passes, thrown five touchdowns and zero interceptions. The offensive line is still horrid, but the running game is coming along. I don't want to say I'm at ease watching this side of the ball. But I don't feel as though I'm about to watch a terrible flaming car crash, which is progress from how I felt watching the Giants ten-sack, 17-3 beat-down in Week 4. So how do I see this playing out? I'm cautiously thinking that in this season of utter parity, the Bears now have a legitimate shot at making it out of the NFC. If the Packers had stayed healthy (Sorry Teach), then they would be markedly better than anybody else. But they aren't, we're better than them. Atlanta and Matt Ryan don't scare me either. New Orleans has a good record but isn't the same powerhouse as last year. We already showed we can beat Philly. We're going to the Super Bowl.
Side Note: You will understand my haste in writing about my beloved Bears, when they end up stumbling to the finish line with a record of 9-7, after losing the last four games. My power to jinx anything or everything good happening in my life should not be underestimated.
The Chicago Bears and the Bloody Knee of the SEC
In Chicago Bears, In Jay Cutler, In Josh Spilker, In Keynote Speaker, In NCAA, In NFL, In SEC, In VandySeptember 2, 2009
LCB is pleased to announce its first ever keynote speaker. His name is Josh Spilker, and he writes for the music and lit blog Deckfight. He is also a Vanderbilt graduate, which provides him with his vantage point for today's topic:
If the SEC is a body, then Vanderbilt is the bloody knee. Everyone keeps telling the SEC to stop their bleeding, but they can't; they don't see it as an emergency. And so from this beat-up knee the Vandy football program flows. Vandy thinks they belong in the SEC, even though they are staining everyone else's program.
And if Vandy is a bloody knee, then Jay Cutler and Earl Bennett were the thin, overwhelmed gauze that tried to keep everything together.
Most know Jay Cutler because of his own indecisiveness at Denver, saddled with his unique quality of being "a good quarterback coming from Vanderbilt." He grew up about three hours from Nashville, everybody wanted to make him something else--we were just happy that a quarterback wanted to play for us.
If the SEC is a body, then Vanderbilt is the bloody knee. Everyone keeps telling the SEC to stop their bleeding, but they can't; they don't see it as an emergency. And so from this beat-up knee the Vandy football program flows. Vandy thinks they belong in the SEC, even though they are staining everyone else's program.And if Vandy is a bloody knee, then Jay Cutler and Earl Bennett were the thin, overwhelmed gauze that tried to keep everything together.
Most know Jay Cutler because of his own indecisiveness at Denver, saddled with his unique quality of being "a good quarterback coming from Vanderbilt." He grew up about three hours from Nashville, everybody wanted to make him something else--we were just happy that a quarterback wanted to play for us.
Our measure of a "good" quarterback was pretty easy to reach, Cutler somehow made the passes--accurate and on-time and that's all it took for us to swoon. We didn't know how good he was until the scouts told us, because, well, we don't know a lot about football. But it seems more likely with the learning curve and the talent already present, that if the Titans would have selected Cutler instead of Vince Young, he would be an All-Pro several times over and have more wins to his name.
But then we wouldn't have this--five Vanderbilt players on the same roster. The Chicago Bears, of all the teams have five Vanderbilt players, not some expansion pansy like the Texans or Jaguars. A team with history, a team with passionate fans...a team with fans. Something the Vandy guys aren't used to at all.
To find five Vanderbilt players in the league is miraculous, that five are on the same team is a Jesus coming again, rapture-type occurrence. To find five Vanderbilt players in Chicago is like five homeless men getting elected to the City Council...it could happen, but it's not likely.
How Jay Cutler, Earl Bennett and D.J. Moore all ended up on the same Chicago Bears team is more than a coincidence--everyone who put those guys on the same team knew what they were doing. No team, especially not the Bears (or maybe especially the Bears) could be that stupid. So the most overlooked story arc in all of the Jay Cutler saga that unfolded the past 6 months was the fact that Earl Bennet was on the Bears team. It's no joke that Cutler had his best season with Earl Bennett catching the ball. Their learning curve will be light and easy.
I know there are other "academic" schools in the same predicament as Vandy: Wake Forest, Tulane, Georgia Tech, Duke, Northwestern, even BYU. But all of those teams have had some consolation of some sort (except Duke). A solid double digit winning season in recent years. A possible Heisman candidate. High rankings. And Duke, well, Duke has the freakin' basketball program (which is supposed to be Vandy's 'good' sport though they've been sharing it with baseball here lately).
But then we wouldn't have this--five Vanderbilt players on the same roster. The Chicago Bears, of all the teams have five Vanderbilt players, not some expansion pansy like the Texans or Jaguars. A team with history, a team with passionate fans...a team with fans. Something the Vandy guys aren't used to at all.
To find five Vanderbilt players in the league is miraculous, that five are on the same team is a Jesus coming again, rapture-type occurrence. To find five Vanderbilt players in Chicago is like five homeless men getting elected to the City Council...it could happen, but it's not likely.
How Jay Cutler, Earl Bennett and D.J. Moore all ended up on the same Chicago Bears team is more than a coincidence--everyone who put those guys on the same team knew what they were doing. No team, especially not the Bears (or maybe especially the Bears) could be that stupid. So the most overlooked story arc in all of the Jay Cutler saga that unfolded the past 6 months was the fact that Earl Bennet was on the Bears team. It's no joke that Cutler had his best season with Earl Bennett catching the ball. Their learning curve will be light and easy. While the wound that is the Vandy football program was oozing all around them, these guys were the only bandages--making plays, catching passes, actually bringing excitement to the meager 20,000 or so that usually show up for a Vandy football game. That we went 5-6 with Cutler and Bennett one year is amazing, that we started that year 4-0 has become a mere footnote. With solid wins against Wake Forest and Arkansas on the road, we couldn't pull out two more wins. Losses included a two-point loss to down-the-road mid-conference rival Middle Tennessee State and a 49-42 OT loss to the Florida Gators. Those four glorious weeks were filled with the dreaming and scheming to make a bowl game in Hawaii, forget that we hadn't achieved that in 50 years. The fact that with the two best players ever in Vanderbilt football's history we still couldn't do it shows just how easily this knee bleeds. Bennett went on to finish his career at Vandy as the SEC's all-time leading receiver and was drafted by the Bears in 2008, setting the stage for D.J. Moore.
If Bennett and Cutler were the most accomplished skill players in the history of Vanderbilt, somehow we also grabbed D.J. Moore, perhaps the all-around most exciting player in recent memory. A threat on both sides of the ball and on special teams, D.J. was the ultimate showstopper--we would all stop catching up about law school or med school or macroeconomics to watch him play. Not that I really ever discussed any of that, I just made fun of the people that did and then I stopped and watched also. I couldn't help it. D.J. would catch, intercept and return balls for touchdowns. If the program was all bloody and beat-up, D.J. Moore at least poured out effusively, rather than the slow trickle of fatigue that usually enwraps the whole team in the 4th quarter. Somehow, we made a bowl game last year, our own Nashville Music City Bowl as we finished out the year 7-6. Again, it was ugly, but they made it. God bless 'em.
And now here's a rant: Most say that we don't have enough "athletes" to compete in the SEC, meaning that brains and brawn don't go together. I don't think that's really the case, but I will say that we "give up" on games, quite often as a matter of fact. It's true we may not have the best athletes, but we sure know when to quit. Logically, the football ethos doesn't make sense. The odds are often against comebacks, the mantra to keep going and keep trying rings hollow to the sanest of minds. It's not that Vandy lacks "athletes," it's that the players think about how to use their athleticism...and think that it doesn't make sense to sacrifice their bodies for concussions in the fourth quarter of meaningless games.
The same goes for us, the fans. It's true at a Vanderbilt football game there will be more opposing fans tailgating than home team fans. Once, my wife's parents, die-hard University of Georgia fans asked me the best place to tailgate on campus, and I had no answer. I don't know. Most people go to frat parties, go out to eat, stop playing Halo or just roll out of bed and then head to the game at the end of the first quarter. Then and only then does it depend on whom they're playing. Chances are, most fans are likely to attend a game if a team from their home state is playing. Alabama natives attend the Alabama or Auburn game and so it goes. Or maybe we'll go to catch Tim Tebow, just because we see him on ESPN and hear he was God or something like that. But even then, God gets very few Vandy students away from Halo. We also refuse to sacrifice our bodies or solid Halo time for Vanderbilt football or the Almighty.
"I was told many years ago, by a true giant in this business, that when kids come out of those schools, they also take a quantum step in the league," said Bears general manager Jerry Angelo in a Sports Illustrated article in May about the fact that the Bears had five Vandy players. "They were more prepared to come into the league because they were more grounded, understood how to balance academic load with football load, needed less structure, meaning they could handle time and money better, because they had to balance football and school 50-50, vs. maybe 80-20 at some football-first programs."
In other words, they knew how to balance sense with sensibility compared to the other cheating, lying, no-good stupid lugheads in the SEC (One of our chants involves something with an SAT score in it, but now I forgot what it was). At least that's what us Vandy fans have to tell ourselves about players on other teams, to keep ignoring how we are the bloody knee of the SEC.
If Bennett and Cutler were the most accomplished skill players in the history of Vanderbilt, somehow we also grabbed D.J. Moore, perhaps the all-around most exciting player in recent memory. A threat on both sides of the ball and on special teams, D.J. was the ultimate showstopper--we would all stop catching up about law school or med school or macroeconomics to watch him play. Not that I really ever discussed any of that, I just made fun of the people that did and then I stopped and watched also. I couldn't help it. D.J. would catch, intercept and return balls for touchdowns. If the program was all bloody and beat-up, D.J. Moore at least poured out effusively, rather than the slow trickle of fatigue that usually enwraps the whole team in the 4th quarter. Somehow, we made a bowl game last year, our own Nashville Music City Bowl as we finished out the year 7-6. Again, it was ugly, but they made it. God bless 'em.
And now here's a rant: Most say that we don't have enough "athletes" to compete in the SEC, meaning that brains and brawn don't go together. I don't think that's really the case, but I will say that we "give up" on games, quite often as a matter of fact. It's true we may not have the best athletes, but we sure know when to quit. Logically, the football ethos doesn't make sense. The odds are often against comebacks, the mantra to keep going and keep trying rings hollow to the sanest of minds. It's not that Vandy lacks "athletes," it's that the players think about how to use their athleticism...and think that it doesn't make sense to sacrifice their bodies for concussions in the fourth quarter of meaningless games.The same goes for us, the fans. It's true at a Vanderbilt football game there will be more opposing fans tailgating than home team fans. Once, my wife's parents, die-hard University of Georgia fans asked me the best place to tailgate on campus, and I had no answer. I don't know. Most people go to frat parties, go out to eat, stop playing Halo or just roll out of bed and then head to the game at the end of the first quarter. Then and only then does it depend on whom they're playing. Chances are, most fans are likely to attend a game if a team from their home state is playing. Alabama natives attend the Alabama or Auburn game and so it goes. Or maybe we'll go to catch Tim Tebow, just because we see him on ESPN and hear he was God or something like that. But even then, God gets very few Vandy students away from Halo. We also refuse to sacrifice our bodies or solid Halo time for Vanderbilt football or the Almighty.
"I was told many years ago, by a true giant in this business, that when kids come out of those schools, they also take a quantum step in the league," said Bears general manager Jerry Angelo in a Sports Illustrated article in May about the fact that the Bears had five Vandy players. "They were more prepared to come into the league because they were more grounded, understood how to balance academic load with football load, needed less structure, meaning they could handle time and money better, because they had to balance football and school 50-50, vs. maybe 80-20 at some football-first programs."
In other words, they knew how to balance sense with sensibility compared to the other cheating, lying, no-good stupid lugheads in the SEC (One of our chants involves something with an SAT score in it, but now I forgot what it was). At least that's what us Vandy fans have to tell ourselves about players on other teams, to keep ignoring how we are the bloody knee of the SEC.
But now, Jay Cutler, Earl Bennett, Hunter Hillenmeyer, D.J. Moore and Chris Williams will play harder than they ever thought they could--it now makes sense for them too. They are getting paid to sacrifice their bodies--the risk now makes sense compared to the reward.
I know there are other "academic" schools in the same predicament as Vandy: Wake Forest, Tulane, Georgia Tech, Duke, Northwestern, even BYU. But all of those teams have had some consolation of some sort (except Duke). A solid double digit winning season in recent years. A possible Heisman candidate. High rankings. And Duke, well, Duke has the freakin' basketball program (which is supposed to be Vandy's 'good' sport though they've been sharing it with baseball here lately).I hope these five Vandy guys find success at Chicago. I think I'm actually, kind of sort of a Bears fan as they are every Vandy fans' one hope at football glory, albeit by proxy. At least there is a rooting interest with a real sense that maybe, yes, maybe the Vandy-led Chicago Bears can find a way to victory. Which is more than I can say for the actual Vanderbilt football team.
Jay Cutler vs. John Elway
In Denver Broncos, In Jay Cutler, In John Elway, In NFL, In TeachOctober 26, 2008
The Packers are off this week, which means I really have no personal investment in this week's NFL games, so I'm going to focus on building up Jay Cutler's morale. After all, in our NFL previews, I stated that we had the Broncos too low and that they were my sleeper pick in the AFC.
I based this belief on the idea that Jay Cutler is the reincarnation of Charlemagne and that the players on the Broncos defense have awesome names. I thought these were sound foundations to base predictions. I also made dinner for a girl last week and thought that two servings of uncooked rice didn't look like it could feed two people, so I filled a whole meat loaf tin with rice, without adjusting the quantities for the rest of the recipe's ingredients--I now have 30 servings of rice sitting in a meat loaf tin, in my fridge. I don't feel like eating that much rice and that's probably how Bronco fans feel like watching their team's defense and hearing Cutler say things like, "My arm is stronger than John Elway's, and it's not even close." I expect the city of Denver will soon grow tired of eating rice every day, just as Apollo grew tired of Achilles.
Bronco fans, have no fear. A Trojan Horse full of rice is not waiting outside the walls of Denver, and while there may be too much rice in the fridge, let's focus on what matters, which is Jay Cutler's arm strength, offering plenty of variety in the leftover department and acts on the field that make the gods shiver. Elway may have delivered trips to the Super Bowl, but think of all the things Cutler can do for himself and the city of Denver with just his arm:
10) Cutler probably has a whiter smile than Elway ever did because with his incredible arm strength he can brush his teeth quicker and harder. While the speed and force of his brushing may cause his gums to recede at an alarming rate, he will have the best smile in the NFL for at least two more seasons and that has to bring joy into living rooms of thousands of Americans every week--Jay Cutler's smile, made possible by his arm strength, will make it easier to bare the weight of a struggling economy.
9) No one in the Broncos locker room struggles with opening jars of pickles because the bulging biceps of Jay Cutler are always willing to help out. Rod Smith's career overlapped the end of Elway's career and the beginning of Cutler's, and he says that Cutler is already ten times the jar opener that Elway ever was. He did add that what Elway lacked in strength he made up for with craftiness. Apparently, Elway always kept a butter knife on hand, in his locker, and with this knife he would bang the lids of jars, allowing himself to open even the toughest of jars. Still, not everyone has time for this technique to be implemented. Sometimes, when a pickled is needed, it's needed now.
8) If the NFL ever replaces the coin flip with an arm wrestling match between the quarterbacks of two opposing teams, then the Broncos will never lose because Cutler pretty much stated that his arm is stronger than not only Elway's but every quarterback in history. His word is his bond.
7) There are days when Cutler's smile can't cheer up everyone. I mean, Javon Walker didn't exactly leave Denver in the happiest of states, but that's where Cutler's arm strength shows its diversity. He's the best companion to have at a traveling carnival. His arm strength allows him to win all sorts of stuffed animals. If one wants a stuffed monkey, then he'll knock over all the cans, knock all the moles on the head, and hammer the strength bell to the moon. Cutler is a provider of all things warm and fuzzy.
6) If Denver ever wins a Super Bowl and goes to Disney World, then Cutler will easily win that sword in the stone contest, making him the only person over ten to ever do so. Elway may have won two Super Bowls, but if Cutler ever even wins one, then he will eclipse Elway by replacing King Arthur. I also think that a man who possesses Excalibur will probably win more than one Super Bowl, until Brandon Marshall sleeps with his wife and Mile High Stadium catches on fire. On second thought, if the Broncos ever go to Disney World, they should not tell Cutler about it. Camelot isn't worth it.
5) Jay Cutler can easily do more pull-ups than John Elway. He also can climb up a rope in gym class faster. In fact, I hear Elway only won the National Fitness Award. Cutler, on the other hand, is Presidentially fit.
4) Whenever one of the Broncos moves in or out of a new home, things are always made easier by Jay Cutler's arms. He is, however, still working on angling couches through doorways.
3) John Elway may have been a potential star in baseball, but imagine all the avenues available to Jay Cutler because of his arm strength. He could be a baseball player, a boxer, a wrestler, an ultimate fighter, a decathlete, a championship weight lifter, the list goes on. Bronco fans need to just think about how lucky they are that Jay Cutler chose to pursue football instead of a sport that would have landed him on a Wheaties box.
2) The Colorado chapter of the NRA's biggest complaint against Barack Obama's bid for President is that he will reverse the 2nd Amendment, which would clearly make Jay Cutler's arm illegal.
1) Now that Jay Cutler's arm strength can not be doubted, Atlas is pondering retirement. When children in Sunday School sing "He's Got the whole World in His Hands," many of them believe "His Hands" are Jay Cutler's.
Smiting doesn't always take the form of lightning bolts. Sometimes the smite is as small as a broken finger. Of course, Achilles was brought down by his heel. Jay, I suggest not talking for a while and letting time, wins, and losses be the judge of one's strength. Besides, when those judges brag about one's strength, they tend not to limit the discussion to one body part, that is little more than a piece to the puzzle or a cog in the machine, and if this concept is difficult for you to grasp, then go ask Elway, the man whose temple you're vandalizing, because his strength was not limited to his arm.
I based this belief on the idea that Jay Cutler is the reincarnation of Charlemagne and that the players on the Broncos defense have awesome names. I thought these were sound foundations to base predictions. I also made dinner for a girl last week and thought that two servings of uncooked rice didn't look like it could feed two people, so I filled a whole meat loaf tin with rice, without adjusting the quantities for the rest of the recipe's ingredients--I now have 30 servings of rice sitting in a meat loaf tin, in my fridge. I don't feel like eating that much rice and that's probably how Bronco fans feel like watching their team's defense and hearing Cutler say things like, "My arm is stronger than John Elway's, and it's not even close." I expect the city of Denver will soon grow tired of eating rice every day, just as Apollo grew tired of Achilles.
Bronco fans, have no fear. A Trojan Horse full of rice is not waiting outside the walls of Denver, and while there may be too much rice in the fridge, let's focus on what matters, which is Jay Cutler's arm strength, offering plenty of variety in the leftover department and acts on the field that make the gods shiver. Elway may have delivered trips to the Super Bowl, but think of all the things Cutler can do for himself and the city of Denver with just his arm:
10) Cutler probably has a whiter smile than Elway ever did because with his incredible arm strength he can brush his teeth quicker and harder. While the speed and force of his brushing may cause his gums to recede at an alarming rate, he will have the best smile in the NFL for at least two more seasons and that has to bring joy into living rooms of thousands of Americans every week--Jay Cutler's smile, made possible by his arm strength, will make it easier to bare the weight of a struggling economy.
9) No one in the Broncos locker room struggles with opening jars of pickles because the bulging biceps of Jay Cutler are always willing to help out. Rod Smith's career overlapped the end of Elway's career and the beginning of Cutler's, and he says that Cutler is already ten times the jar opener that Elway ever was. He did add that what Elway lacked in strength he made up for with craftiness. Apparently, Elway always kept a butter knife on hand, in his locker, and with this knife he would bang the lids of jars, allowing himself to open even the toughest of jars. Still, not everyone has time for this technique to be implemented. Sometimes, when a pickled is needed, it's needed now.
8) If the NFL ever replaces the coin flip with an arm wrestling match between the quarterbacks of two opposing teams, then the Broncos will never lose because Cutler pretty much stated that his arm is stronger than not only Elway's but every quarterback in history. His word is his bond.
7) There are days when Cutler's smile can't cheer up everyone. I mean, Javon Walker didn't exactly leave Denver in the happiest of states, but that's where Cutler's arm strength shows its diversity. He's the best companion to have at a traveling carnival. His arm strength allows him to win all sorts of stuffed animals. If one wants a stuffed monkey, then he'll knock over all the cans, knock all the moles on the head, and hammer the strength bell to the moon. Cutler is a provider of all things warm and fuzzy.
6) If Denver ever wins a Super Bowl and goes to Disney World, then Cutler will easily win that sword in the stone contest, making him the only person over ten to ever do so. Elway may have won two Super Bowls, but if Cutler ever even wins one, then he will eclipse Elway by replacing King Arthur. I also think that a man who possesses Excalibur will probably win more than one Super Bowl, until Brandon Marshall sleeps with his wife and Mile High Stadium catches on fire. On second thought, if the Broncos ever go to Disney World, they should not tell Cutler about it. Camelot isn't worth it.
5) Jay Cutler can easily do more pull-ups than John Elway. He also can climb up a rope in gym class faster. In fact, I hear Elway only won the National Fitness Award. Cutler, on the other hand, is Presidentially fit.
4) Whenever one of the Broncos moves in or out of a new home, things are always made easier by Jay Cutler's arms. He is, however, still working on angling couches through doorways.
3) John Elway may have been a potential star in baseball, but imagine all the avenues available to Jay Cutler because of his arm strength. He could be a baseball player, a boxer, a wrestler, an ultimate fighter, a decathlete, a championship weight lifter, the list goes on. Bronco fans need to just think about how lucky they are that Jay Cutler chose to pursue football instead of a sport that would have landed him on a Wheaties box.
2) The Colorado chapter of the NRA's biggest complaint against Barack Obama's bid for President is that he will reverse the 2nd Amendment, which would clearly make Jay Cutler's arm illegal.
1) Now that Jay Cutler's arm strength can not be doubted, Atlas is pondering retirement. When children in Sunday School sing "He's Got the whole World in His Hands," many of them believe "His Hands" are Jay Cutler's.
Smiting doesn't always take the form of lightning bolts. Sometimes the smite is as small as a broken finger. Of course, Achilles was brought down by his heel. Jay, I suggest not talking for a while and letting time, wins, and losses be the judge of one's strength. Besides, when those judges brag about one's strength, they tend not to limit the discussion to one body part, that is little more than a piece to the puzzle or a cog in the machine, and if this concept is difficult for you to grasp, then go ask Elway, the man whose temple you're vandalizing, because his strength was not limited to his arm.
NFL Preview: #22
In 2008 NFL Season Preview, In Charlemagne, In Denver Broncos, In Denver the Last Dinosaur, In Jay Cutler, In TeachJuly 18, 2008
Team: Denver Broncos
Division: AFC West
Last Year's Record: 7-9
Head Coach: Mike Shanahan
Key Losses:
Jason Elam K
Travis Henry RB
Javon Walker WR
Rod Smith WR
Key Additions:
Boss Bailey LB
John Engelberger DE
Darrell Jackson WR
Michael Pittman RB
Breakdown of the Offense:
In the late '90s, the Denver Broncos were the Romans of the NFL. In '97, they conquered Hannibal, played by Brett Favre, and the Carthagenians to announce their dominance of the league. John Elway was Caesar Augustus, and every quarterback Denver has had since plays against the first emperor's legacy. Brian Griese was Nero, dragging the empire down, and Jake Plummer was Constantine, temporarily propping it up. Now, Pope Shanahan thinks he's found his Charlemagne and is looking to establish a new Holy Roman Empire.
Is Jay Cutler Charlemagne?
If so, then when Jay utters his famous words, "let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky," what he really means is "let my armies be" Brandon Marshall, Keary Colbert, Daniel Graham, and Selvin Young. The trees, the rocks, and the birds are more intimidating. Of course, this could be because no one knows much about Jay's weapons.
Brandon Marshall is a 6'4", 230 pound wide receiver, who went for 1,325 yards last year and seven touchdowns. He is now entering his fourth season. Selvin Young carried the ball 140 times for the Broncos last year, averaging 5.2 yards a carry, giving him a total of 729 yards. If Selvin can keep his ypc around four, then the Broncos will be delighted, as long as he finds the end zone more than the one time he did last year. These two guys along with Jay Cutler give the Broncos a young nucleus to work with on offense.
If Cutler can build on his 2007 campaign that saw him throw for 3,497 yards, 20 touchdowns, and only 14 interceptions, then expect decent production from tight end Daniel Graham and wide receivers Keary Colbert and Darrell Jackson as well.
Breakdown of the Defense:
How awesome is it that on one defense there is a guy named Champ and a guy named Boss? How much more awesome is it that they are brothers, and if that wasn't enough, they're both Georgia Bulldawgs. Plus, the defense also has a guy named Dre Bly on it and a stingy, hard-hitting, veteran safety named Lynch. This defense may be one of the best named defenses of all-time. The results on the field might be slightly different.
The unit's strengh is in its secondary. Champ Bailey and Dre Bly form one of the best corner tandems in the league, and John Lynch is still formidable at strong safety; but he's also thirty-six years old.
Weakside linebacker D.J. Williams led the team in tackles last year, and the addition of Boss Bailey allows the team to move Nate Webster from the starting spot on the strong side to the bench. This group is not spectacular, but it's not horrible either. They'll have their moments, which is probably how one could sum up the entire defense, which consists of an unproven front four, a mediocre linebacking core, and a couple of veteran playmakers in the secondary.
Position Grades:
QB---B: Where does Mike Shanahan's glass elevator take Jay Cutler now? I hear it goes in every direction: up, down, right, left, zig, zag, forwards, backwards, Super Bowl, and out of the playoffs.
RB---B-: Selvin Young needs to show he can be a featured back. Michael Pittman adds versatility and depth.
WR/TE---C+: Brandon Marshall is promising, but what can they get from Keary Colbert and Darrell Jackson? Jackson had his best years with another West Coast guru in Mike Holmgren. Oh, and I almost forgot, white guy fantasy favorite Brandon Stokley is also on the team.
OL---C: This unit gave up a total of thirty sacks last year, but with a young quarterback, it's hard to place the blame correctly. They'll be starting a rookie at left tackle in Ryan Clady, formerly of Boise State.
DL---D+: John Engelberger is a key addition?
LB---C: Niko Koutovides will be starting at middle linebacker. I don't know what that means.
DB---B+: I would give them an A, except at some point Champ, Dre, and John Lynch have got to start showing their miles. Also, Hamza Abdullah is their free safety. He falls in my "?" category.
Outlook: I know we've got them ranked #22 and my peers aren't that high on this team, but I think they might be a bit of a darkhorse in the AFC. If the young guys on offense progress and develop some chemistry, then they have a chance to be good on that side of the ball. Also, they have an easy schedule. Who doesn't want to play Oakland and Kansas City a total of four times? I feel like they're three wins to be had in those four games. They also play Atlanta and Miami, which could give them two more wins. Then it just comes down to can they beat the teams that are on their talent level, which will go a long way to telling all those watching whether or not Jay Cutler is a Charlemagne or another Nero. I think he's the former. At worst, this team finishes where it did last year.
On a side note, Rod Smith retired this offseason after an underrated career. His retirement pretty much cuts all ties the Broncos had in uniform to the John Elway years, so Rod, this song's for you....
Schedule:
WK 1 @Oakland
WK 2 San Diego
WK 3 New Orleans
WK 4 @ Kansas City
WK 5 Tampa Bay
WK 6 Jacksonville
WK 7 @ New England
WK 8 BYE
WK 9 Miami
WK 10 @ Cleveland
WK 11 @ Atlanta
WK 12 Oakland
WK 13 @ NY Jets
WK 14 Kansas City
WK 15 @ Carolina
WK 16 Buffalo
WK 17 @ San Diego
Berndon4's Thoughts: If only the Chiefs weren't so bad, the Broncos would be in the AFC West basement. Denver making the playoffs is about as likely as Travis Henry putting down the bong and wearing condoms.
Langston's Thoughts: The second best team in the league's worst conference is no success. The team has too many holes.
Division: AFC West
Last Year's Record: 7-9
Head Coach: Mike Shanahan
Key Losses:
Jason Elam K
Travis Henry RB
Javon Walker WR
Rod Smith WR
Key Additions:
Boss Bailey LB
John Engelberger DE
Darrell Jackson WR
Michael Pittman RB
Breakdown of the Offense:
In the late '90s, the Denver Broncos were the Romans of the NFL. In '97, they conquered Hannibal, played by Brett Favre, and the Carthagenians to announce their dominance of the league. John Elway was Caesar Augustus, and every quarterback Denver has had since plays against the first emperor's legacy. Brian Griese was Nero, dragging the empire down, and Jake Plummer was Constantine, temporarily propping it up. Now, Pope Shanahan thinks he's found his Charlemagne and is looking to establish a new Holy Roman Empire.
Is Jay Cutler Charlemagne?
If so, then when Jay utters his famous words, "let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky," what he really means is "let my armies be" Brandon Marshall, Keary Colbert, Daniel Graham, and Selvin Young. The trees, the rocks, and the birds are more intimidating. Of course, this could be because no one knows much about Jay's weapons.
Brandon Marshall is a 6'4", 230 pound wide receiver, who went for 1,325 yards last year and seven touchdowns. He is now entering his fourth season. Selvin Young carried the ball 140 times for the Broncos last year, averaging 5.2 yards a carry, giving him a total of 729 yards. If Selvin can keep his ypc around four, then the Broncos will be delighted, as long as he finds the end zone more than the one time he did last year. These two guys along with Jay Cutler give the Broncos a young nucleus to work with on offense.
If Cutler can build on his 2007 campaign that saw him throw for 3,497 yards, 20 touchdowns, and only 14 interceptions, then expect decent production from tight end Daniel Graham and wide receivers Keary Colbert and Darrell Jackson as well.
Breakdown of the Defense:
How awesome is it that on one defense there is a guy named Champ and a guy named Boss? How much more awesome is it that they are brothers, and if that wasn't enough, they're both Georgia Bulldawgs. Plus, the defense also has a guy named Dre Bly on it and a stingy, hard-hitting, veteran safety named Lynch. This defense may be one of the best named defenses of all-time. The results on the field might be slightly different.
The unit's strengh is in its secondary. Champ Bailey and Dre Bly form one of the best corner tandems in the league, and John Lynch is still formidable at strong safety; but he's also thirty-six years old.
Weakside linebacker D.J. Williams led the team in tackles last year, and the addition of Boss Bailey allows the team to move Nate Webster from the starting spot on the strong side to the bench. This group is not spectacular, but it's not horrible either. They'll have their moments, which is probably how one could sum up the entire defense, which consists of an unproven front four, a mediocre linebacking core, and a couple of veteran playmakers in the secondary.
Position Grades:
QB---B: Where does Mike Shanahan's glass elevator take Jay Cutler now? I hear it goes in every direction: up, down, right, left, zig, zag, forwards, backwards, Super Bowl, and out of the playoffs.
RB---B-: Selvin Young needs to show he can be a featured back. Michael Pittman adds versatility and depth.
WR/TE---C+: Brandon Marshall is promising, but what can they get from Keary Colbert and Darrell Jackson? Jackson had his best years with another West Coast guru in Mike Holmgren. Oh, and I almost forgot, white guy fantasy favorite Brandon Stokley is also on the team.
OL---C: This unit gave up a total of thirty sacks last year, but with a young quarterback, it's hard to place the blame correctly. They'll be starting a rookie at left tackle in Ryan Clady, formerly of Boise State.
DL---D+: John Engelberger is a key addition?
LB---C: Niko Koutovides will be starting at middle linebacker. I don't know what that means.
DB---B+: I would give them an A, except at some point Champ, Dre, and John Lynch have got to start showing their miles. Also, Hamza Abdullah is their free safety. He falls in my "?" category.
Outlook: I know we've got them ranked #22 and my peers aren't that high on this team, but I think they might be a bit of a darkhorse in the AFC. If the young guys on offense progress and develop some chemistry, then they have a chance to be good on that side of the ball. Also, they have an easy schedule. Who doesn't want to play Oakland and Kansas City a total of four times? I feel like they're three wins to be had in those four games. They also play Atlanta and Miami, which could give them two more wins. Then it just comes down to can they beat the teams that are on their talent level, which will go a long way to telling all those watching whether or not Jay Cutler is a Charlemagne or another Nero. I think he's the former. At worst, this team finishes where it did last year.
On a side note, Rod Smith retired this offseason after an underrated career. His retirement pretty much cuts all ties the Broncos had in uniform to the John Elway years, so Rod, this song's for you....
Schedule:
WK 1 @Oakland
WK 2 San Diego
WK 3 New Orleans
WK 4 @ Kansas City
WK 5 Tampa Bay
WK 6 Jacksonville
WK 7 @ New England
WK 8 BYE
WK 9 Miami
WK 10 @ Cleveland
WK 11 @ Atlanta
WK 12 Oakland
WK 13 @ NY Jets
WK 14 Kansas City
WK 15 @ Carolina
WK 16 Buffalo
WK 17 @ San Diego
Berndon4's Thoughts: If only the Chiefs weren't so bad, the Broncos would be in the AFC West basement. Denver making the playoffs is about as likely as Travis Henry putting down the bong and wearing condoms.
Langston's Thoughts: The second best team in the league's worst conference is no success. The team has too many holes.
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