David Stern Bans Skip Bayless from Talking about NBA

After admitting to the use of DHEA, a substance banned by the NBA, on ESPN's show First Take, Skip Bayless received a strong message from NBA commissioner David Stern.

"In light of Mr. Bayless' recent admission to the use of a banned substance, Mr. Bayless will no longer be allowed to discuss the NBA in any media form or media outlet. We thank Bayless for his years spent bashing several of our players, coaches, and overall product."

Skip Bayless responded, "I don't understand this. How does the use of DHEA give me an advantage in broadcasting over say a Woody Paige, who only gets jelly injections in his donuts? I've taken DHEA for years and look at me. At best, I'm the Lord of the Dance. If David Stern wants to ban somebody, he should ban LeBron James. Isn't not shaking hands a sign of PED use and not PDA use? I say ban Prince James, not the Lord of the Dance."

Many physicians believe that DHEA may not enhance athletic performance a great deal, but that the use of DHEA may increase one's delusions of grandeur and overall negativity.

An anonymous NBA player commented on the situation, "Good riddance, that man's hated us for years."

The lifetime suspension for Bayless comes on the heels of a ten game suspension handed out to Orlando Magic forward Rashard Lewis, for the use of DHEA.

(Skip Bayless' declining testosterone levels)